Tag Archives: mike o’mary

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Story Circle Network and She Writes

by Mike O’Mary

Writing used to be a solitary profession. You sat in a room by yourself, typing away on your typewriter or computer, sometimes long into the night. If you were lucky, you toiled away in an upstairs room instead of in the basement. And if you were really lucky, maybe you were part of a local community of writers, and you could get together to talk about writing, books and publishing opportunities with other edu-ma-cated types. That’s if you were fortunate enough to have enough writers nearby to form a community. The key word was “local.”

Not anymore. Writing is still a solitary profession when it comes to actually doing the work. But with the Internet, it’s easier than ever to be part of a community of writers. Heck, I think I belong to 40 or 50 online writing communities. Sometimes it seems like there are more writers than readers. (Fortunately, most writers are also capable of reading. Most of them.)

For starters, there’s a great community of writers who frequent Freelance-Zone.com. On top of that, FZ provides you with a pretty comprehensive list of writers groups. Just click on the “‘Writers Groups by State” tab up there on the right. You can also find lots of writers groups on LinkedIn (including Freelance Nation).

Beyond that, there are new communities for writers popping up all the time. Two communities I’ve been recommending to women writers are Story Circle Network and She Writes.

scnlogoThe Story Circle Network is dedicated to helping women share the stories of their lives and to raising public awareness of the importance of women’s personal histories. SCN carries out its mission through publications, a website, classes, workshops, writing and reading circles, and woman-focused programs. SCN founder Dr. Susan Albert tells me that they will soon be inviting submissions for the May Sarton Memoir Prize, a new prize to be awarded annually.

50556_175987360307_548556_nShe Writes describes itself as “a community, virtual workplace, and emerging marketplace for women who write.” They currently offer support and advice for novice and experienced writers. Future plans are to connect writers directly to readers “in a marketplace distinguished by its commitment to the production and distribution of high quality content.”

Mike O’Mary is founder of Dream of Things and of the Note Project, a campaign to “make the world a million times better” by inspiring participants to write 1 million notes of appreciation. Coming March 20, 2011.

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The Law of Comparative Advantage

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Hand cleaning blackboardby Mike O’Mary

A couple of Saturdays ago, I met with some high school kids and talked about writing. I told them that if they know how to write, they will always have a job.

I used to believe that. Now I’m feeling like I should have qualified my advice. (Maybe something like “In between layoffs, there’s a good chance you’ll find some form of work if you know how to write well.”)

One of them asked me when I decided to become a writer. I told them that when I was a senior in high school, our English teacher gave us a writing assignment. I wrote a story about growing up in Louisville. It was a mix of humor and pathos, and that’s what I’ve been writing ever since.

It was a nice simple answer, but not the whole truth. The truth is that although I could write in high school, I was better at math. I took six years of math in four years of high school, and went to college with the intention of being in math major. Then during my freshman year of college, I found myself struggling through a calculus class (a class I had already taken in high school!). The turning point for me came during class one day when I wasn’t getting it, even though I was paying close attention and taking lots of notes. I turned to the student next to me  and realized he wasn’t paying attention at all. He was doodling. I said, “What are you doing?” He said, “I’m calculating the density of a star.” The next day, I became an English major.

But that’s not all of the story. I still had the math bug in me. So I also studied economics and became an English/economics double-major. Along the way, I learned about the Law of Comparative Advantage, which is when I really decided to be  a writer.

The Law of Comparative Advantage is usually discussed by economists as it relates to international trade, but it applies to individuals, too. I sum it up this way: if you are good at math and good at writing, the greater good of society will be served if you do the one where you have the greatest “comparative advantage” relative to other people. In my case, I’m good at math…certainly better than average…but not enough better than average to stand out compared to people who calculate the density of stars while doodling. On the other hand, I’m also good at writing (not as good, in my opinion, as I am at math, but I have a bigger comparative advantage in writing compared to the average writer than I do in math compared to the average mathmetician.

I don’t mention all of that to brag about my skills in math or writing. Believe me, there are people who are WAY better at both (either?) than I am. But the Law of Comparative Advantage helped me understand and feel good about my career choice. Even so, when the high school kids asked me about my decision to be a writer, I took creative license and told them about my high school English teacher rather than about the Law of Comparative Advantage. I hope they’ll forgive my white lie — even as they stand in line at the unemployment office twenty years from now cursing my name.

Perhaps if they write well enough, they’ll at least be able to barter for some calculus.

Mike O’Mary is founder of Dream of Things, an book publisher and online retailer.

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It’s an Ambiguous Life

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10 Note iStock_000004513105smallby Mike O’Mary

Just about everybody’s favorite movie during the holidays is “It’s a Wonderful Life.” Everybody includes me. However, I think Frank Capra may have slightly off the mark. Sometimes it’s a wonderful life. But most of the time, it’s pretty ambiguous.

Oh, sure. Things turn out pretty well for Jimmy Stewart in the movie. But sad to say, for most of us, things would not be so cut and dry.

Have you ever wondered what the world would be like without you? What it would be like if you had never been born?

Maybe you think you’ve made the world a better place. But maybe your neighbor–the one who doesn’t like your dog and thinks you should mow your grass more often–maybe he liked things just fine before you came along. You see, value judgments–is life wonderful, or does it suck–are subjective. And subjectivity implies ambiguity.

With this in mind, I recently sat down to list all the pros and cons in my life. And frankly, I got a little depressed. For every good thing I had done in my life, there was something I shouldn’t have done–or something I should have done and didn’t. But it doesn’t hurt to sit back and think about the things you’ve done that made you feel good about yourself. And the things you’ve done that hurt your self esteem. Then do more of the former and less of the latter. And above all, be alert. Good things happen every day.

Like I said, it’s an ambiguous life. But it can still be wonderful. And in the end, we often find that ambiguity and wonder are not mutually exclusive.

Mike O’Mary is founder of Dream of Things, and author of Wise Men and Other Stories, a collection of holiday-related essays.

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Facing Our Fears as Writers

iStock_000010261391XSmallby Mike O’Mary

Here’s a great quote on writing for you: “When you write about something more important than your fears, the story will come.”

That’s an excerpt from a recent post by John Rember about writing memoir, but it applies to all types of writing. Rember goes on to say, “Writers often face what looks like a bleak choice: either resurrect unpleasant memory, or focus on happier times and risk writing stories that are superficial and contrived and short on meaning. In a memoir, it’s hard to hit the depth of emotion and wisdom you want to convey without including seminal events. Some of those seminal events are going to be dark and disturbing or full of shame and embarrassment. It won’t always come easily or happily, but once it’s on the page, it will have the capacity to deepen the experience of your reader. So…deal with it. And the way you deal with it is scene by scene, story by story, until you’ve got it finished on the page. Finish it well enough, and it can’t hurt you anymore.”

For the entire post on writing memoir, click here. And when you have written something that isn’t “superficial and contrived and short on meaning,” please submit it to Dream of Things.

Dream of Things was founded in 2009 with the intent of publishing anthologies of creative nonfiction that will fill the gap between popular anthologies that publish stories that are “short and sweet” (sometimes so saccharine-sweet they are hard to swallow), and the Best American Essays series, which are typically quite a bit longer. The goal for Dream of Things anthologies is to publish writing that is not short and sweet, but short and deep. With depth comes authenticity. The result is stories that are easier to swallow because they are authentic, and easier to digest because they average 1,250 words in length. Dream of Things is currently seeking submissions for anthologies of creative nonfiction on a variety of themes, including stories of forgiveness, coffee shop stories, travel writing, life in the modern workplace, Internet dating, and others. See the Workshop section of dreamofthings.com for more details, including payment information and submission guidelines.

Mike O’Mary is founder of Dream of Things, a book publisher and online retailer.

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John’s Thanksgiving

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6 johns thanksgivingby Mike O’Mary

In honor of Thanksgiving, and in honor of the publication of MFA in a Box by my friend, John Rember, today’s post is a (mostly) true story called “John’s Thanksgiving.”

John’s Thanksgiving

My best friend, John, will probably be mad at me for telling this story. But it’s such a great Thanksgiving story, I can’t resist.

This happened many years ago, during John’s first year of college. He had gone East from Idaho in order to attend a prestigious university. And now that his first school vacation—the Thanksgiving holiday—was at hand, he had decided to remain out East rather than travel back to Idaho to be with his family. He had some friends at school, but most of them had gone home for the holidays.

So come Thanksgiving Day, John woke up in a deserted dormitory building. That in itself would be enough to depress many people. Waking up alone on Thanksgiving Day. But he got up, got dressed and was doing fine. Until he called home to talk to his family members… Continue reading John’s Thanksgiving →

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Sometimes Less is More

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by Mike O’Mary

I recently worked with a freelancer who really knew his stuff. In fact, he knew way more about the subject matter than I did, which was great. Except for one thing: he didn’t know when to shut up.

That probably sounds harsh. Let me explain. I was extremely busy at the time, which is why I needed help from a freelancer in the first place. So I just needed to get some things done. But every time I talked to the freelancer, I got not just the update that I needed, but also the full back story about all the different options he had considered, the research he had done, the sources he had consulted, similar jobs he had done for other clients, alternative approaches, etc., etc. Which wasn’t a BAD thing. It was more like it was too much of a good thing.

Normally I’d be glad to hear a freelancer’s suggestions. To a point, anyway. But not this time. I just needed to get some things done. I’m a very patient person, but I found myself interrupting the freelancer to say things like “That’s great, but I don’t need to know all of that,” and “Maybe we can do that next time…for now, let’s just focus on getting this done.”

Then came this exchange:

Me: “We’ve made good progress. I’m meeting with the executive team on Monday. I’ll go over it with them then.”

Freelancer: “I can come to that meeting if you want.”

In my head I was thinking, “There’s no way in hell I’m going to let you babble in front of our executives. I’ll look like an idiot for letting you attend the meeting.” Instead I said, “Thanks, but I don’t think that will be necessary.”

In the end, the project was a success, and I may use the person again. But I will do so with the knowledge that I will have to manage my contact with the freelancer and never, ever let him have contact with anybody else at the company.

What’s the lesson from all of this? Maybe it’s that I’m a jerk of a client. But it hasn’t been that long since I was a freelancer, and I can remember how tricky it is to feel your way with a new client. You want to make your client look good. You want to be proactive and make suggestions that add value for the client and prove your worth. You may even want to get in on the meetings with senior executives where you could add even more value. But first, you have to read your primary contact and make him or her happy. Sometimes that means focusing in on the task at hand, picking up on verbal and nonverbal cues, and getting the job done. It may not feel like you’re adding value – especially when you have ten great ideas that are all better than the task or approach you were assigned. But perception is reality, and sometimes from the client’s perspective, doing exactly what you are asked to do and helping your client meet a deadline IS the best way to add value. And sometimes that’s a tough pill to swallow – and maybe the hardest part of freelancing. It’s the part I liked least…the fact that I was often called in toward the end of the project to help with execution after all of the strategic decisions had been made. I had some great ideas! I just had to learn to save them for the right client and the right situation.

I realize this post may sound cynical and unappreciative. That’s not my intention. I’m just trying to point out that one of the most challenging things about being a freelancer is figuring out exactly what it is that your client needs and how to deliver that without undershooting or overshooting the mark.

I’d be interested in hearing other perspectives on this topic. What’s worked for you as a freelancer when it comes to scoping out your client’s needs? What advice do you have for people on the client side of the equation?

Mike O’Mary is Founding Dreamer of Dream of Things, a book publisher and online retailer.