I spotted the above sign while driving back to Chicago from Toledo, Ohio and was inspired to write something for new editors who are about to put out a call for freelancers or writing staff. Writers, you should read this and take notes–knowing the mind of a potential editor is important to your survival in this business. As I am about to put out a call for new freelancers, this list is definitely top of mind. I dread posting those “freelancers wanted” ads, because I’ll get a flood of responses from people who belong in clown college rather than behind the keyboard. The three to five good results I get are worth the hassle, but when I am reading the slop, I don’t believe it.
I don’t view this so much as advice as sharing about how I personally do business. For some editors, this top ten won’t work, and that’s the nature of the biz, but I’m willing to bet at least 75% of those new to the editing game can find something useful here:
Top Ten Writer Traits Which Scream, “Don’t Hire Me”:
10. Misguided Cover Letters. Don’t tell me anything unrelated to the job ad–and don’t bother replying to an ad which seeks a specific type of writer unless you fit the bill. I once put out a job ad requesting replies only from writers who were also musicians. One cover letter in my inbox started out, “I am a voiceover artist.” That’s nice, buddy, but that’s NOT what I asked for. In case you’re wondering, the rest of the ad made it perfectly clear I was seeking musicians only, no other type of performers. The respondant clearly couldn’t follow instructions.
9. Clips From “Content” Websites. Sorry, kids, but if I see Associated Content, HubPages, or any other content mill material used as writing clips, it sends big warning flares off in my head. I’d rather see an unpublished clip directly related to my publication’s focus than some generalized crapola you took five minutes to write and edit before posting to the content mill. Submitting content clips screams “amateur” to me.
8. Clips From Blogs. If I am LOOKING for a blogger, I’ll ask for blog clips. If I need ARTICLES, blog clips don’t do me a damn bit of good when trying to evaluate the appropriate skills. Blogging is NOT article writing, and vice versa.
7. Submitting Fiction. Unless specifically asked for fiction clips, never include your short stories or novel excerpts when replying to a job ad. This is among the worst judgement errors you can make as it shows a fundamental lack of understanding about how the game is played. I have plenty of time for noobs and beginners as long as they show initiative and at least TRY to respond properly to a job ad or call for writers.
6. Not Including Basic Contact Info. The writer who sends an e-mail address but no phone number looks to me like someone who didn’t take their time with the cover letter. That is a bad way to begin a relationship.
5. Kooky E-Mail Addresses. Some editors may disagree with me here, but if I get a cover letter and resume from “CookieButt66@hotmail.com”, I am much less inclined to take the sender seriously. You can’t take five minutes to get a hotmail addy with a professional-looking address? SPARE ME. The next button I am likely to push after reading your return addy is the DELETE key. It’s a bad, mean world out there.
4. Being Inappropriately Familiar. I hired a freelancer once upon a time who started addressing me as “Bud” and “Dude” in the earliest days of our professional relationship. I like my OWN NAME, thanks. Freelancers, please don’t do this. It makes it sooooo much easier to fire you later when you start dropping your plurals or misusing the apostrophe. Oh, and I HATE being called “Sir”. Some editors like it, but I am not one of them. Try to feel out your new editor first before you start in with the nicknames or excessive honorifics. Do it for ME.
3. Talking Out Your Arse. If you are applying for a writing gig or sending a query on a topic that you don’t quite truly understand, reassess your ability to write for that publication, but don’t give up on the gig just for a lack of information. I once hired a talented writer and video producer who admitted to me right up front that she didn’t know a great deal about the subject at hand, but was willing to learn and take the initiative to do it on her own time. I hired her immediately. I have moved on from the editor’s chair at that publication, but I’ve kept in touch and know she has done quite well. It all started with her honesty and willingness. Never underestimate the power of that willingness and enthusiasm, it can make up for a lack of subject matter expertise. Just don’t FAKE IT. You will accidentally misuse a technical term or refer to an outdated bit of data and will be revealed as a wanna-be.
2. An Inability To Follow Simple Instructions. I delete all resumes and cover letters with attachments, and say so in the job ads I post. If you can’t take the time to completely read the job ad and learn what my requirements are, you are already wasting my time just by responding. What makes me, the editor, think you’ll do any better if I actually screwed up and HIRED you?
1. Admitting To…ANYTHING. Some new writers put something in their cover letters along the lines of, “I don’t have any published clips.” or even more foolishly, “I don’t have much experience writing, but I hope you’ll take a chance on me.” I know there is a difference of opinion among editors on this one, but I believe you should never open the lines of communication with such nonsense. Your first impression is too valuable to waste; I’d rather get a cover letter from someone who can SELL themselves than someone who is WARNING YOU up front not to hire them. Don’t waste my time telling me what you haven’t done. Instead, tell me what you CAN do. That’s how you close the deal.
I have to say that Asshat’s comment is pure genius! There are many ways to check out writers if you are interested in finding the right one for the job! When Joe was expressing his frustration at the lack of capable applicants he was getting, I made the suggestion that he go out and look for someone who is writing good stuff and pursue THEM. If you hear a writer’s “voice” that you like or see a byline on a piece that you enjoyed reading, it just might be a good idea to track that person down and investigate further….
Just a thought; based on the post above…
I personally have had this happen. I’ve been contacted by editors based upon pieces that I have had published. I’ve gotten great paying gigs from this, so there must be editors out there doing it. I think it is worth the time–even in a busy editor’s schedule–to look into tracking down writers who are capable, reliable–and yes–well behaved in “public”.
The forum idea is a great one–and not just for AC. There are plenty of writing forums out there……..
I think the point may have been missed by some people feeling offended regarding their work at AC. I don’t think that maligning those who work there was the intent of Joe’s post. Indeed, he may have vented hard, but I personally have seen some of the responses he has gotten. He is NOT exaggerating that there are some unbelievable things that come into his inbox. Seriously.
No rehashing was required nor requested. I simply commented on your ill-mannered sweeping generalization. Should you feel the need to defend yourself then by all means, rehash away.
What would you advise for a writer who basically ghostwrites web content? I have articles on AC, Helium (ugh, I know) a few things in a community newspaper, but most of my content is ghostwritten web content for various companies. Would you advise putting an excerpt on a resume?
@Yolander
Great question! Content writing (as in SEO content, which is what it sounds like you do) is one of the most lucrative non-magazine writing gigs available at present. I would call list this type of writing on a resume as either SEO writing, commercial writing or web copy depending on the gig.
Using SEO and web copy on your resume and as clips is a great stepping stone technique to higher paying web content gigs. Anything you do on AC or other content mills can be used as a stepping stone to get into web content writing, but it sounds to me like you’re already there and looking to go to the next level.
I’d look around for higher paying web content, SEO and blog writing opportunities and use the clips you already have as bait. Especially if you are writing in a powerful niche such as finance and health. You can also use these web content writing gigs to step into regional lifestyle magazine writing, which itself is a stepping stone to bigger players on the newsstand.
I’d inlcude relevant clips from your web content and SEO/ghostwriting gigs for any other similar jobs you’re looking for. By the way, you can easily step into pro blogging with a list of clips like that—try the job boards on Problogger.net and look for a niche you are already writing about and have clips for…you might be surprised at what you find!
@8 “Associated Content doesn’t cut the mustard because of the bad rep these clips have because they don’t go through any kind of serious editorial review”
So you are not able to read an article on Associated Content and tell whether it is well-written or crap? You have to rely on the judgement of the editors on other sites to compensate for your lack of editorial skill?
To the prior commenter; If you don’t like being judged because of the bad reputation of the network you belong too, perhaps in the dog eat dog world of success, maybe it’s better to hang in a more reputable crowd? Just say’n (Grins),,,
I’ve broken a number of your rules and have still written for both local and national magazines regularly. I nailed one article on the basis of Letters to the Editor which I sent (along with a cover letter) to the editor of a magazine. I didn’t include a single clipping with that one.
The editor called me and said that she felt compelled to look up my article based on the strength of those readers’ letters. Readers who write to magazines are readers who don’t just read an article, put it down and forget about it – a point I did make in my query letter, along with a tightly written paragraph and unusual article idea.
That particular editor understood the value of writers who could get readers to take the time to write praises about an article. The fact that one reader said the article may have saved her life may have been the selling point.
When it comes to editors, I have often wished they held equally high standards for themselves as they seem to expect of their writers. I’ve had editors who’ve changed the race of a profile subject without bothering to check for accuracy (national magazine). I had an editor who published my article and only sent my $750 payment after I noticed the magazine while standing in line and thought the article looked familiar. They even included my byline, expediting payment when I called.
Still, I did have to call to receive that payment, after discovering only by chance that my article was published. And then…there was the editor who decided to quit but sent me payment for an article they’d accepted even though she wasn’t sure it would be published under the new editor. That was an $800 windfall, not that I’m complaining about that last error, although the article wasn’t being done “on spec” but I actually had a contract, signed.
Snobbish drivel in my opinion. Some of the best writers around write for some of those “content mills.” By all means, continue to pass them over. I will gladly use them for my publications.
One of the best qualities of a good editor is to be able to sift through and find the “diamonds in the rough” – It is obvious that you do not have that capability with your sweeping generalizations and offensive remarks.
Good luck with ignoring the future of writing.
Ref: 9, That would depend on the job. If you are applying for a job writing web content, generating a ton of page views on AC would be a good thing to mention.
There is a lot of crap on AC so AC writers normally do not include AC as a reference other than online gigs. AC is a learning experience for most content producers which contributes to the crap, but many CP’s develop into decent writers.
In any case, you are learning how to build a little more traffic to your blog 🙂
jcorn’s comment about editors is well taken with me. I’ve worked with many great ones, but I’ve also had my share of miserable experiences. And, unfortunately, we don’t get the luxury of screening them before we work with them!!